Five Poems

by

bank robbery #8

i was a professional baseball player
known for my bunting
she pronounced boise like
‘boy-see’
i pronounced boise like
‘boy-zee’
someone could have written
a song about us
it would have been a hit
and it would have made
no sense
one year she got really into poetry
and she made me take her to readings
and there was one reading
where they charged us at the door
something like twelve bucks
can you believe that
twelve bucks
to listen to some people read some poems
and after the reading
i pulled her aside
and said
‘i’ve got a poem for you’
i said it menacingly
but what happened was
i gave a her kiss
a dry peck
where am i going with all of this
we were in love
and we never went to another poetry reading
and we were on our way to the bank

 

bank robbery #2

when i wake up
i check my email
and if there are no new emails
i rob a bank

i’ve gone four days
in a row
without a new email
so that’s four banks robbed

if i don’t get a new email soon
i’m either going
to get caught
or get rich

 

bank robbery #7

all you need is
a car
and a gun
or something
that looks like a gun
sometimes it’s better
if it just looks
like a gun

 

bank robbery #5

my name is rob
and i work at the bank
i was there
you know
when it all went down

 

bank robbery #3

carl had a gun
and marla was carl
except the ‘c’ was an ‘m’
and she tacked on the ‘a’
because she liked decorating
the christmas tree
oh and she also had a car
and so they got along
and away
for a while
but they were found
and carl used the gun

 


Joseph Grantham is the author of Tom Sawyer and Raking Leaves. He was born in Kansas City, MO.